Thursday, February 19

eharmony is time consuming

After filling out a painstaking long survey about myself I hae already been rejected by 5 people because I didn't have a picture posted yet. Note to anyone who is going to do eharmony, have the pictures ready to go before you sign up. I even wrote in my profile that I would have a picture posted soon but I guess 2 days isn't quick enough. I just don't have pictures of me anywhere because I dont take pictures very often and I didn't want to take pictures of myself at work and by the time I get home I am all gross and sweaty from the gym and don't feel like cleaning up and getting ready for a stupid photo. Anyway I got one up and poted now but I feel like I need more so if you have any pictures of me anywhere (preferably flattering) I would appreciate you sending them to me so I don't have to take more lame ass pictures of myself.

I have been sent a good number of matches but I am sure you will not be suprised to find that the ones I want to communicate with are all from the bay area or the LA area (my search area is 300 miles). All of my matches from Fresno are not at all exciting. I swear there have to be some cool, attractive, interesting people in Fresno but they apparantly don't need to date online. When I lived in Austin I would look at the guys on Match.com and there were a ton of good men. Don't believe me, try searching for guys in Fresno and then try a metropolitan area and see what a drastic difference there is in the quality of men. Obviously I don't expect there to be as many quality men in Fresno based on the fact that there are simply less men here, but c'mon on just 1 or 2??

Back to it being time consuming though, I guess one of the good things is that they get your feedback on every match so they can further determine what you like and don't like, but it takes time to fill that info out and then you also have to send your match a Closed Message telling them why you don't want to communicate with them. The ones you do want to communicate with you send 5 questions to and wait for them to respond. That is where I am right now, waiting for responses. Good thing I signed up for 3 months because this is going to take awhile.

12 comments:

Adam said...

Oh yeah, the picture is key. When I had a profile on one of those services, you didn't get looked at without a picture.

Lulu said...

Right, and I totally get that but give me a second to get one up. I probably wouldn't be interested in someone if I didnt have a picture of them to look at but if they said they will have one up soon I would give them a chance before rejecting. I guess I am one of the few people who doesn't have a shit load of pictures of myself lying around. Oh well, I wouldnt have been interested in any of the people who rejected me anyway so it all worked out.

Madison said...

Good luck with your "prospects." I'm finding your search very interesting because I'm curious how these guys match up in person in comparison to their profiles. I mean let's face it, we all try to talk ourselves up on the computer. Hope you find a keeper, or at least someone to help pass the time!

edluv said...

it's true, i don't need to date online.

and, if you want, we can always take pictures of you. i'm thinking of: you getting out of your truck, you going up the stairs, your surprised face when you're greeted as you open your door and find someone already in your apartment, you sleeping, and so on. and yes, those are all intended to sound creepy (and funny, too).

Lulu said...

That is a fantastic idea Ed, I can have you guys be my own personal papparazi and you can follow me around and take pictures of everything I do. Bicep curls at the gym, arguing with my dad, drunk at the local...the men will come in droves!
Seriously though I might have you take a few when we are out this weekend.

edluv said...

ny gawd that would be funny to have photos of you working out, taken from random spots in the gym. like, peaking through equipment. i so want to do this because it's insanely stupid.

the more i think about this the less funny it seems.

Lulu said...

Are you a bit bipolar today Ed? You start out seeming to think it sounds really funny, then a few seconds later, not so funny?

Jack said...

Hi Lulu,

I’m Jack, and I work for eHarmony, so your blog caught my attention. Good for you for writing in your profile that you are getting photos posted. Matches who are actually looking at that important part of your profile and like what you wrote will be willing to wait. But yeah, like everyone said, photos tell a story about you, and you can’t underestimate how they can tell a story about you.

Just from what I’ve seen from thousands of members…it usually does take time – if you are looking for something long-lasting. If you are looking for mediocre or casual dating, you can probably find it a lot more quickly. We’ve always said that being on eHarmony requires patience…patience to fill out the Questionnaire, patience to send and wait for communication, and patience (and really perseverance) in meeting new people that may or may not be right for you till you find the right one. Some get lucky and find it quickly.

Just a little note about the method to the “madness” of all the steps: the intention is to address your “deal-breakers” before getting too involved with someone. We hope to spare people from wasting time, energy, and heartbreak with the wrong matches. Good luck out there in Fresno. Hope you get the match of your dreams soon.
Good Luck!!
-Jack

m.wise said...

that was nice of jack. and i agree with him...good luck with this.

Lulu said...

Yes, well thank you Jack, I look forward to seeing what eharmony can do for me. I certainly cant imagine it doing any worse than what I have done for myself in regard to dating! I think this service offers more than other similar dating sites and the personality profile was eerily accurate.

Thanks Mike!

Justin said...

About a year ago my room mate had some family and friends over and one of them said that he had recently signed up with eHarmony, and just the other week his mom mentioned that she was flying out to the wedding of that same guy. He was marrying a girl he met through the site. Clearly it works for some, so good luck.

Lulu said...

That's awesome. My sister met her husband on Match so some people indeed have really good luck with this. Thanks Justin.